Tuesday, November 30, 2004

The Trouble With Mothers

Now back to our regularly scheduled programming.

So el Cubano and I have political issues we need to work out. Fine. We are talking about that. The hard part however is dealing with the people outside of our immediate relationship and coming clean about a few things.

The trouble with mothers is that they never really like me, especially the mothers of people that I am madly in love with. An engagement when I was way too young ended because of my fiancee's mother (best thing that could have happened though). The few mothers that have liked me, liked me because I presented myself as something I am essentially not, a good stereotypical doting mujer who serves her man first at dinner. I'm really incredibly domineering, controlling, and expect my partner to serve me damnit (well not all of the time, just most of the time).

El Cubano's mother knows nothing about me. She may remember that one time, years ago, I spoke to her , well I asked her if I could speak to El Cubano. She asked El Cubano who I was. Of course he said I was a co-worker because well you see he had a steady girlfriend at the time that everyone in his family knew about (I did not).

So now all of a sudden el Cubano is going to tell his mom not only that I exist , but that he is in love with me, and that I am going to move to California with him and my seven year old daughter.

El Cubano's mother is the one person, in my opinion, who has the strangest hold on El Cubano. This comes from an abusive history between them and his desire , in spite of himself, to please her and take care of her. She also has a horrible triggering effect on his moods.

So I have resigned myself to the fact that she will dislike me. She will dislike how we met. She will dislike that I was the other woman (which in my defense I didn't know), she will probably dislike that I am a single mother.

Oh well none of these are firsts.



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