Thursday, April 06, 2006

The Chichos are Coming

An ex-boyfriend of mine once named me "la reina de los chichos" and even got his then 6 or 7 year old son to call me that too. That ex-boyfriend, who said he loved me, had somewhat of a Jesus complex, thinking that just because I stopped stripping while I was dating him he had saved me. That ex-boyfriend 12 years my elder had the bad habit of pinching fat from my ample hips and speaking to my chichos as if they were separate from me. It wasn't : "Mala, are you hungry?" it was "Do the chichos want to be fed?". Hips and fat that carried babies and sat in jail cells were mutilated and animalized. I was not the sum of my internal and external "parts". I was just grasa.

A few weeks ago I slipped into a teal jersey knit dress that showed enough to be sexy but was still classy. I was going on a date to a nice restaurant for cocktails. My mother gave me the once over before saying, "Don't take this the wrong way...." followed by a long pause.
Usually when my mother says not to take something the wrong way it means she is about to utter something that can only be taken the wrong way. Maybe she was going to insult my latest choice in romantic partners. Maybe she was going to criticize me as a mother for daring to go on a date on a school night.
"You're not fat, but you should get a girdle, faja to keep your chichos in place."
la faja magica, the amazing pantyfaja and what seems like endless products like them flash across the screen in between novelas and cover the back pages of Spanish language magazines. They promise to hold my chichos in place. Hide my chichos. Where exactly do chichos belong? Where exactly should I hide them? Is it ever appropriate to show off my chichos, to say, "Yes this roll on my left side came from the slamming pernil abuelita made and this one over here I've had since I had my child."

My mother was right. I am not fat. I have the privilege of not being looked down upon or having a million stereotypes thought about me, my eating habits, my hygiene and my health as so many people who identify as fat do (and plenty of people who don't identify as fat too). But I still have chichos and I'll be damned if I'm going to hide them or squash them into submission.

Love me. Love my chichos.


Blogger rabfish said...

great fucking post.

love the chicos!

mothers are so good at the unwanted comments that go deep.

btw the dress sounds nice!!

4/06/2006 11:35:00 AM  
Blogger Ms.Maegan said...

Gracias mujer. Since I can't post as often as I'd like , at least I'm trying to make em count.

The dress is brilliant

4/06/2006 11:56:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

booo!! we should have had a pic to a pic of the dress to look at to help with the mental pictures.

splendid post, btw.

4/06/2006 02:42:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

great post.

4/06/2006 03:42:00 PM  
Blogger Homofictus said...

Funny how you don't put up a pic of the "chichos."

The presence of "too" many is a sign that you're probably not too healthy... And are prone to a mess of other health problems. It doesn't take much to be "in shape" take stairs walk, stop with soda and refined sugars... There is a reason why they "aren't" supposed to be there.

Don't get me wrong, I think in moderation--it can actually be pretty sexy. It just can't be sloppy, ya know?

Well, enjoy your dress!

4/07/2006 12:01:00 AM  
Blogger rabfish said...

sloppy? holy shit. talk about assumptions and associations.

ok, so what is it, not 'too' much chico for health, or sexy factor decided by someone else? the contradictorines takes my breath away, and that ain't cuz i'm 'out of shape.'

4/07/2006 12:10:00 AM  
Blogger Ms.Maegan said...

Ay Homofictus, nice to see that you haven't lost your fatphobic side. ::shaking head::

4/07/2006 07:54:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

hey babe.. i never minded them when we were together!!!then again we probably burned them forget the're just right!!!

4/07/2006 02:18:00 PM  
Blogger Ms.Maegan said...

Ay F. you make me ::giggle::.

4/07/2006 03:51:00 PM  
Blogger 4F said...

Sorry for my ignorance (I live in the UK), but what are chicos?

I second that the dress sounds nice, tho.

4/11/2006 04:17:00 AM  
Blogger Debra said...

I'm guessing lovehandles, more or less? But I'm not really sure. Either way, based on what I've seen of Mala in pics, she's a good looking lady and has nothing to be ashamed of, whatever comments her mom throws her way!

Moms are the best at tossing things out that are just downright wrong. Grandmas might be the only ones able to top them- I hear from mine often enough on the topics of meeting men at bars, inter-racial anything, and many others.

4/12/2006 02:15:00 PM  
Blogger kactus said...

Ah, it never fails that as soon as a woman starts to discuss her body, favorably or not, somebody's gotta pop up with the health issue. It's like a homing signal or something: "this woman's got more than skin and bones! Oh my god!"

Do they even realize how tiresomely predictable they are?

4/15/2006 12:08:00 PM  

Post a Comment

<< Home